Body love and body dysmorphia

The idea of wearing a bikini, let alone posing in one, used to make me feel pretty uncomfortable and insecure. Tbh it still does. You wouldn’t know it by looking at me, but I’ve had some pretty gnarly thoughts about my body growing up and I’m certain I experienced body dysmorphia for a long time. My thighs were big. My butt was big. I had (have) cellulite. These thoughts plagued me for a long time… it wasn’t until I was in my 30s when I felt comfortable to wear a bikini around others — and for myself! How many women and girls have skipped beach parties and pool days because they were embarrassed about their body? Or who wore shorts and t shirts and grabbed any towel to quickly cover up? I know I have. The value and worth we place on our bodies physical appearance takes up a lot of mental space, which just isn’t worth it. What is worth it? Loving and honouring your body and all that it does for you. And knowing that what your body looks like doesn’t define your value or attractiveness or how wonderful and smart and funny you are. I wish I paid more attention to that train of thought back when I was a teen, and young twenty something. I wish I was better about that even now.
Ann Lamott has a great quote — on how what if we wake up as old ladies and regret not doing the fun juicy things because we worried how squishy and jiggly our bodies looked…it’s a terrible thought to think we will regret not having awesome experiences because what our bodies look like — and one I’ve thought of often because I was that girl. One that I hope no other girl or woman has to worry about!
On #nationalbikiniday let’s honour who we are underneath these meat suits, do our best to love and honour every piece of ourselves, and say yes to the pool parties and say yes to our big beautiful juicy life… all the while strutting in that the bikini of our dreams, no towel grabbing, no shame… just love.


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