As many of you know I WROTE A BOOK. Say, whaaaat?! It was one of those magical happenstances in which I said to the Universe last year around this time, “I am going to write and publish my first book this year. I don’t know how this is going to happen but THIS IS MY INTENTION.” I had just come out of one of those dark, introspective periods. You know the type: they’re funky as hell but they force you to get real about the stuff that really matters to you. The type of stuff that you don’t want to regret on your death bed. It’s your WILDERNESS, and we’re all Reese Witherspoon/Cheryl Strayed in these moments and we strap on our little backpacks and go off in the unknown to reclaim ourselves in the open abyss. Something like that.
Anyway. I was there. I got out of it. I made my intention, and, like two months later (!!), I checked my spam folder and saw an offer from my editor at Adams Media. That offer turned into a book proposal, which turned into me signing with my agent, which turned into me creating a manuscript — all within three months! I remember when I had pushed Send on my last edit — I collapsed onto the floor in a fit of exhausted giggles. I WAS SO TIRED. BUT HAPPY. HAPPY TIRED is the best feeling because it’s like…you’re energetically spent by the thing(s) that inspire you and light you up — and that’s feeling worth chasing. Always.
Now that manuscript is the book, FRIENDSHIP SIGNS, a fun book on astrology and friendships. If you’re interested/curious about astrology and want to know how to better understand and deepen your friendships, then BUY IT! There’s also a fun quiz!! It’s a fun book, and I hope you guys like it.
But, yeah, so now that book is out in the world! and, so I find myself being like…now what?! Intentions and goals are awesome. They bring clarity and purpose into our lives. It was so exciting to write a book! The whole process was a whirlwind as I was writing and editing the book, alongside my freelancing work. I loved every minute of it. And when it was over — I felt accomplished and proud! But the high has worn off, and now I find myself almost at the exact place where I was last year. I say “almost” because I am not the same person I was last year (I am not even the same person I was yesterday). I have learned a lot about myself over the past 365 days, and one of the biggest things I have come to accept is…this is normal. The low after the high. The abyss. The wilderness. The backpacking adventure to find ourselves. And it is ESPECIALLY normal to feel this way after we’ve hit a milestone. I think it would be less normal if you didn’t!
Why? Because this gnarly place means we are GROWING. We are not who we used to be prior to the goal/intention/milestone achieved. It’s okay that we want to “get off” on something new now because we’ve changed. I say this now with more confidence and self-acceptance, but I didn’t get here instantly. I felt weird and guilty for feeling empty after having something that I wanted for so long. I was thrilled…until I wasn’t. Which was a strange place to be because wasn’t this what I wanted for myself? Yes, it was. And I did it, and it was super cool…but in order to evolve…this can’t be it. It shouldn’t be it. I can love opportunity and have gratitude for it — which I do — but it’s also okay to be a little over it. It’s okay to feel a little lost because I’m on my path towards the next milestone — whatever that is.
So if you’ve hit a goal recently, and you feel a little down post-achievement, I want you to know that it’s perfectly NORMAL to feel this way. Do NOT feel guilty. You should actually be thanking your lucky stars that you feel this way because how you feel right now is an indication — your BIG FREAKING SIGN — that you’re on your way to BIGGER things.
Relish the milestone that you hit. Be grateful for it. And be okay with moving on. Be okay with not knowing where you’re headed. Be okay with moving slowly. Follow your curiosity. This is the exciting part. We might feel a little “what the fuck” right now but we will find our next destination. And when we do? We will create that INTENTION, own the shit out of it, and before we know it, we will be HAPPY TIRED!!!
Here’s to the next Happy Tired project.